Things I Hate About Taiwan #1: Marble-tiled Sidewalks
I should start this series of posts by first mentioning that I’m not a hater. That said, no matter where you go, some things will piss you off, regardless of how open-minded, PC, assimilation-ready you are. Taiwan’s a great country, but it has its rough patches. Here’s one:
It was a rainy winter day in Taipei today. I wore my work shoes today. Unfortunately, the soles of my shoes aren’t exactly Gore-Tex super grip recycled F1 rubber or anything like that. I say unfortunately because whenever it rains here in Taipei (which is often), I slip on the marble-tiled sidewalks which seem to skirt every bank and post office in town. I’m pretty sure that most salarymen here experience the same, slippery imbalance every rainy day.
Luckily, the designers didn’t totally ignore this seemingly obvious flaw. Most of the marble-tiled footpaths have thin “friction strips,” as I like to call them. They aren’t the polished slip-traps of the marble tile, but are rough and cling to your shoe. They’re like buoys in a vast ocean that I tentatively jump to in order to keep from sliding around and bumping into people, or worse, making myself look foolish. If only there were more of these strips.
Quite complaining! LOL Be glad you have sidewalks!! I get now sidewalks down here in Pingtung which means I get to walk along the side of the street with scooters and bikes. Can you imagine what that is like??
That’s true… it could be worse. You live in Pingtung, eh? That’s the REAL Taiwan! Getting down to Kending a lot?
Things I hate about Taiwan:
1. Annoying recorded messages blaring on megaphones over and over again.
2. The screechy nasal sound of Taiwanese shouting into a cell phone when you’re hung over.
3. Taiwanese language in general
4. Probably the world’s worst music
5. People feeling the need to stare at a computer or TV in every possible situation
6. Having to dumb down your conversations to banal pleasantries with everyone you communicate with
7. The smell of Bien Dang on the train and listening to some guy slurping a piece of 7-11 cooked pork down next to you.
8. Being asked the same questions by everyone you meet.
9. Generally awkward socializing.
10. The pollution
11. Horribly bad fashion misses
12. Not a whole lot of art here
13. “Clubs” in Taiwan = 40 year old white guys trying to pick up 22 year olds and bad techno music.
14. Guys taking pictures of themselves and teasing their hairsprayed hair
15. People in general taking pictures of themselves
16. The general cluelessness about art, culture etc. in general. (Where else on earth can Air Supply still sell out a concert and Dylan can’t find a venue?)
17. All the foreigners being English teachers and most of them lost souls.
18. Said foreigners being able to make 2x the salaries of Taiwanese 5x as smart and hard working as them, and getting women out of their league as a result.
19. Tropical Island and I can’t get weed anywhere dammit.
20. People who live here for over 5 years and can’t speak any Chinese (see #18)
Oh, and ICRT
You know what,I totally agree with soome of the points you said.
*The screechy nasal sound of Taiwanese shouting into a cell phone when you’re hung over.
*Taiwanese language
*Probably the world’s worst music(No wonder Jay Chou and Jolin aren’t popular worldwide.Oh wait,who are those people I’ve just mentioned???)
*Being asked the same questions by everyone you meet(Ah yes,the questions being asked by ugly ass stalkers and retarded chink hoes especially in Ximen Ding)
*Having to dumb down your conversations to banal pleasantries with everyone you communicate with
*Generally awkward socializing.
*The pollution(and not to mention the amount of dog shits and littering)
*Horribly bad fashion misses(They’ve got bad taste in clothes and jewelry,it’s like they’re so yesterday like their ancient chink forefathers)
*Not a whole lot of art here(No style and taste=No sense of creativity,that’s why they have to copy one another.Fucktards….)
*The general cluelessness about art, culture etc. in general
*Tropical Island and I can’t get weed anywhere dammit(Now that you’ve mentioned it,I need to smoke some just to get away from this reality of hell.Taiwan=Suicidal Ville)
Here are some of the things I despise:
*the annoying immature hoes you see on Yoyo TV(looks like they need a good fuck in their tight chink vagina and a cock to thrust inside their chink mouths so they can just shut the fuck up)
*Taiwanese people trying to speak “English”
*the old people(anywhere they are and everything they do)
*Taiwanese people acting like blacks trying to street dance and listening to hip hop thinking they’ve already blend into the modern young life when they don’t know they’re just as old as their ancient forefathers when they still have all the old traditional values like respect and honor your elders,study hard and learn to live like a retarded nerd who thinks he/she is cool enough to blend in with the outside world)
*annoying young pricks who sell stuff and ask you questions(man,to be practical,they should sell off their ugly skinny ass chink bodies instead to earn their college intuition fees)
*People who think they aren’t Chinese but Taiwanese.(Come on,Taiwan is nothing compared to China!I mean to be sarcastic,”What is a Taiwan?” Oh it’s a small island located right next to China but I don’t see any small island on the map! [Gets a magnifying glass] Ah…..that’s better!Whoa it looks really small and deserted comparing to China where it’s humongous!)
*The old ugly houses piled in a small ghetto altogether.(Ugh!I’ve never seen anything uglier in my life!)
*the weather(It’s all so fucked up!)
ok, jim had some fair points but drunk and sober- old people? they have those everywhere. and anyone who goes to an asian country and then describes the locals as chinks should go back to their own country and be racist there.
Iam so surprised that no one mentioned…
The fucking stares by everyone (if your foreign.)
The fucking repeating ‘welcome’ in mandarin everytime a shop door opens, like there programmed to fucking say that gwanning sound.
Tons of people on the train even when its fucking late…The place is like one giant ant hive with everyone flowing over each other.
I walk 50 metres and my hair and clothes are ruined by my own sweat, which makes just about everything a mission.
and yes the stares, i fucking hate it, people watching me eat, watching me on the train, fuck i bet they have a way to watch me wank. Mind your own fucking business!
and oh i forgot.
People dont have any fucking manners, just barge you and push in front of you and shit. Almost everyone would push in front of you and feel no way about it.
They all walk so fucking slow and they take up the whole sidewalk fuckkk!!!
I have to wait 72 seconds just to cross a road because it is over run by ants riding scooters.
And i swear some taiwanese girls try to deliberately walk into you…like they think that its going to lead to some fucking romantic encounter that they see in Hollywood….NO iam not interested piss off. p.s and stop fucking staring at me with those fucking eyes.
The buildings and the planning. Ugly houses with bars on their windows. Interior design in offices are horrible! Its like going back to the 70s. No sidewalks. Everything is squares of concrete.